Counter Culture Comedy: Drugs

This was my final paper for my literature and psychology class, and was actually the best part of the class, which dealt very little with either topic in its title.

The use of drugs in our society has always been a controversial issue, and as such was bound to manifest in comedy as a way of relieving the tension. Drug comedy, while fairly late to enter the forum of comedy due to the controversy surrounding the issue, has evolved from its basic roots as drug use becomes more accepted in American society. Furthermore, the elements found within a drug comedy are not often found outside the genre, making them uniquely designed to affect the audience's opinion of drugs and the people who use them.
Most drug comedies portray the deviant drug user as the hero of the movie. These unlikely heroes often achieve their goals accidentally or without realizing it. The villains are almost always police or other law enforcement officials, or drug dealing criminals. When drug comedies first became popular, all the characters involved were very basic and stereotypical. Now that the use of drugs has become more socially accepted, these characters are better developed to be more representative of the whole drug culture rather than a few chosen stereotypes.
Perhaps the first, and certainly the most famous, drug comedies were the Cheech and Chong movies. These movies followed the two characters in their quest to smoke marijuana, avoid the police, pick up women, and play music, the goals of the majority of the drug culture in the late 70s and early 80s. Much of the comedy of the Cheech and Chong movies comes from the many stupid things they do while they are high. Even though they act foolish and are often completely unaware of their surroundings, Cheech and Chong end up being the heroes of their movies usually accidentally. Often times they do not understand or notice the events which allow them to become the heroes, but take it as good luck or coincidence.
One of the keys to the popularity of the Cheech and Chong characters is their representation of members of society who would be considered deviant and the heroes. Cheech, a Mexican, and Chong, a hippie, represented a large amount of American society who felt that they were unappreciated or undervalued simply because of their lifestyles. Many people who were not involved in the drug culture of the 70s can also relate to Cheech and Chong, as they are just two guys who are trying to live their lives who become heroes without trying to seek glory or fame. Similar types of drug-using characters have appeared throughout the comedy world with slight alterations, but the classic Cheech and Chong models still exist.
One notable alteration of the Cheech and Chong drug-using heroes are the characters in Dave Chappelle's Half Baked. In this movie three typical stoners quit their jobs to sell weed in order to raise money to bail their friend out of jail. This movie is a much more relaxed comedy and abandons most of the extreme stereotypes of marijuana smokers to show the many ways in which the drug is used. This is one of the first movies which depicts drug users as a large variety of people who are functional within society, rather than a minority group of outcasts.
The character of “The Dude,” in The Big Lebowski completely alters the stereotypical deviant hero of the drug user. The Dude character is one of the few characters in the movie who is rational and trying to live a normal life. In his attempts to live comfortably, which involves drinking a good many white Russians and smoking joints, he finds that all the sober people keep involving him in their crazy plans, ruining his life and doing massive damage to his car. As he says to Maude “Fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict drug regiment to keep my mind limber.” (Big Big Lebowski) This takes the typical screw-up drug user and makes him the hero not because his screw-ups happen to go the right way, but because he maintains his reason in situations in which everyone else seems to go crazy.
As the use of drugs, especially marijuana, becomes more and more popular among American citizens, so does comedy which revolves around this drug usage. One of the benefits of this is the portrayal of drug users in many ways, as opposed to the following the stereotypes which group all drug users together. This can be seen in Half Baked and The Big Lebowski, but can also be seen in many other comedic forums, including the internet. In 2009, COED Magazine published a humorous article entitled “The 24 Types of Pot Smokers,” which groups marijuana smokers based on various personality traits, giving a brief description of the advantages and disadvantages of each type. The list includes such types as number 10 The True Stoner:
“This easy-going, goofy bastard always starts his days off with a wake-and-bake courtesy of his bedside bowl, followed by as much additional weed smoking as possible. He’ll always have just enough weed on him to keep him going through the day. That is, unless he just re-upped his stash, in which case he’ll smoke most of his bag the first night.” (COED Magazine)

This article and similar comedy regarding the wide variety of marijuana smokers in the United States shows the drastic rise of popularity in drug culture and comedy since the 70s. When the Cheech and Chong movies came out there were very few stereotypes about drug users, most of which revolved around the idea that they were lazy and stupid. Now that marijuana is used by a large percentage of Americans it covers a wider demographic of people, and the availability of material for use in drug comedy has grown.
One of the most original depictions of drug users comes from Grandma's Boy, in which the main character smokes marijuana with the video game testers he works with. This group, which is generally stereotyped as “nerds,” rarely makes appearances in drug comedies due to the conflicting characteristics between them and stereotypical drug users. This unique twist on the drug using hero shows once again the rapidly increasing demographics of drug users in America. This movie alters both the stereotypes of “nerds” and “stoners” to create interesting and well-balanced characters.
The opposite of Grandma's Boy's well-balanced characters can be seen in Kevin Smith's classic drug comedy, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. This comedy follows Jay, the most stereotypical “stoner,” and his “'hetero-life-mate, Silent Bob,'” (Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back) a character who is silent save for a few brilliant lines in which he exposes his intelligence. Like many of Kevin Smith's other movies, this one is filled with non-stop humor from various genres including slapstick, childish jokes, dirty jokes, puns, celebrity jokes, and of course comedic drug references. In one scene Jay and Silent Bob arrive in Hollywood after hitch-hiking from New Jersey and discuss their jobs as marijuana dealers with local crack dealers. At one point Jay mentions that the drug dealers in New Jersey may soon have to go on strike if they do not start receiving medical benefits as part of the job. This scene is important because it shows drug dealers in the same light as other workers who are just trying to provide for themselves or their families.
One of the most recent popular drug movies produced in America, Pineapple Express takes a different approach than normal to drug comedy. This film, while seemingly an outrageous adventure of two unlucky marijuana smokers, can be interpreted as a satire of the entire question of the prohibition of marijuana. The movie opens with a scene in black and white in which the government is testing the effects of marijuana on the military. When the testee responds negatively to a question about his superior officer, the plant is deemed illegal. The rest of the movie is a ridiculous chain misfortune events in which the main characters must attempt to avoid criminals who get their money from selling large quantities of marijuana. As the main character, Dale Denton, says in one of the opening lines of the actual movie: “All this current system is doing is putting money in the hands of criminals, and it's making ordinary people like you and me deal with these criminals.” (Pineapple Express) When examined closely, the movie asks the audience why this process is considered sensible.
The satirical drug comedies are fewer and usually less popular than the typical drug comedy. One excellent recent satire was found in the animated TV show Sit Down Shut Up, in which high school teachers hire a pharmaceutical company to teach kids the dangers of drugs. This show compares pharmaceutical representatives to drug dealers in rival gangs because of the way they compete with one another for territory. It also show how these large companies use their massive resources to try to keep their consumers “brand loyal,” or buying solely from one distributor, so they can maximize their profits. The episode is meant to show the irony of keeping harmless drugs like marijuana illegal while we all use and depend on pharmaceutical drugs. Part of the satire thrown around in this episode questions the broadcast television rules made by the FCC that say that if drug use is discussed on television, negative consequences must be shown. This is a very direct way of comically questioning authority as a means of gaining psychological power over them.
The underlying principle of almost every comedic drug using character is his harmlessness. This allows the audience to sympathize with the main characters even though they are technically criminals, and automatically makes them wonder what is so wrong with recreational drug use. This particular brand of comedy gains its strength directly from defiance to authority, and authority figures represented in drug humor are often depicted as clueless or lazy. Drug related comedy allows tension to be released in a non-violent manner between those in power and the sub-cultures which disagree with them.
Anther important psychological element of drug comedies is the music played. Music is traditionally used in movies as a way of adding to the mood of the scene for the audience. In drug comedies music is always significant to the drug using characters and can be used to express a wide variety of their emotions, or simply to express the high regard for music which most drug users have. The Big Lebowski contains two scenes in which music and bizarre set designs are used to show The Dude's confusion and conflicting emotions. In Pineapple Express, music is used to add an uplifting feeling to scene in which the main characters temporarily forget their dilemma and have a good time smoking marijuana in the woods. In many movies such as Grandma's Boy, How High, and Half Baked, rap music is used during party scenes to convey the idea that everyone is enjoying themselves. The Cheech and Chong movies often included loud rock music during party scenes because rap was not yet as popular with the drug community.
The many elements which compose a drug related comedy are unique to this genre and each has its own psychological function. The overall psychological goal of a drug comedy is to make the audience sympathize with and better understand the drug community as a mostly harmless collection of individuals who are just trying to live their lives differently from mainstream society. Therefore comedians involved in the genre of drug comedy represent hope for all those involved in the drug community that one day they will not be persecuted for the ways they live their lives, but will instead be respected as productive members of society.

Works Cited
Grandma's Boy. Dir. Nicholaus Goossen. Perfs. Linda Cardellini, Allen Covert. Willshire 1, 2006.
Half Baked. Dir. Tamra Davis. Perfs. Dave Chappelle, Guillermo Díaz. Robert Simmons Productions, 1998.
How High. Dir. Jesse Dylan. Perfs. Method Man, Redman. Jersey Films, 2001.
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Dir Kevin Smith. Perfs. Jason Mewes, Kevin Smith. Dimension Films, 2001.
“Math Lab.” Sit Down Shut Up. Cre. Mitchell Hurwitz. Perfs. Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, Kristin Chenoweth. Adelaide Productions, 2009.
Pineapple Express. Dir. David Gordon Green. Perfs. Seth Rogan, James Franco. Columbia Pictures, 2008.
COED Magazine. “The 24 Types of Pot Smokers.” Found at: http://coedmagazine.com/2009/05/18/the-24-types-of-pot-smokers/
The Big Lebowski. Dir. Joel Coen. Perfs. Jeff Bridges, John Goodman. Polygram Filmed Entertainment, 1998.

Hero of the Dull

My final British Literature essay which compares John Dryden's and Alexander Pope's use of mock epic and satire in "Mac Flecknoe" and "Dunciad."

John Dryden and Alexander Pope both use mock epic in their satires “Mac Flecknoe” and “Dunciad” to show the folly of the society in which they lived. Both writers satire the same elements of their society: it's “dullness” and lack of lack of regard for anything outside the immediate physical realm. Their contempt for the society in which they live manifests itself in these mock epics which portray characters striving to achieve dullness and destroy meaning.
The mock epic genre uses the literary devices of epics to praise characters who are unworthy of such devices, making them appear ridiculous by contrast. Both “Mac Flecknoe” and “Dunciad” describe the efforts of their characters to continue spreading their values of dullness and meaninglessness throughout the world. The efforts of these characters in achieving these ludicrous goals are described solemnly using very grandiose comparisons and language that is satirical because it is so out of place in such characters.
“Mac Flecknoe” tells the story of the Irish poet Flecknoe, who realizes his death is near and decrees Shadwell to be his successor as the King of Dullness. Rhymed couplets and triplets are used to describe, at length, why Shadwell is perfectly fit for the this position. In typical epics when a ruler dies he seeks a successor who bears the same qualities and will carry on his rule in the same way. Dryden mimics this in Flecknoe's appointing of Shadwell, “[Shadwell] alone my perfect image bears.” (line 15) Unlike typical epics, however, the traits that Flecknoe admires in Shadwell are anti-heroic traits including dullness, stupidity, witlessness, thoughtlessness, and corpulence. In doing this, Dryden makes Flecknoe's every praise of Shadwell ridicule.
Dryden mercilessly mocks Shadwell's use of language as tautology, saying that his works are essentially lengthy displays of vocabulary and word-play with no meaning at all behind them. Flecknoe takes note of this in the lines “The rest to some faint meaning make pretense, / But [Shadwell] never deviates into sense.” (lines 19-20) He then goes on to list various other out-of-style writers, himself included, as “types,” or prefigurings of Shadwell, “Thou last great prophet of tautology,” (line 30) in the same way that Moses was considered a prefiguring of Christ. Dryden makes Shadwell's inheritance to the throne of dullness seem like a long awaited plan that is finally coming to fruition, much like God's divine plan to send his son to redeem mankind.
Shadwell's coronation scene is described as drawing crowds of bad writers and poets from within a mile and a half of The Nursery that is to be his throne, rather than attracting kings and heroes from vast distances as is typical of true epics. The ceremony of his coronation requires him to swear an oath to his “father,” Flecknoe, “That he till death true dullness would maintain,” (line 115) unlike traditional kingly oaths of protecting one's subjects and upholding justice. Upon the completion of the coronation Flecknoe give a long speech in epic style, praising the new reign of dullness that Shadwell will bring to the world. This is concluded with a lengthy description of Shadwell's qualities which Flecknoe bears but Ben Johnson does not, arriving at the conclusion that Johnson's work, unlike Shadwell's, had minor merit and wit. This adds additional personal insult to Shadwell, who was the self-proclaimed successor of Johnson.
Pope, while disgusted with many of the same characteristics in his contemporaries as Dryden, makes his satirical point in a far less personal manner. “Dunciad,”much like “Mac Flecknoe,” uses mock epic to describe characters who act in the interest of dullness to destroy meaning and bring about an age of Chaos and darkness. The characters involved in this satire are many, but all strive to appease the Goddess of Dullness through repetition and lack of original thought.
Dullness, according to Pope, is born of Chaos and Night and is rightly depicted as having her head concealed by a cloud. In the fourth book, Pope describes the many enemies that she has defeated including Science, Wit, Logic, and Rhetoric. At the same time her allies, Sophistry, Billingsgate, false Morality, and Causistry assist her in carrying out the execution of these enemies so that none may challenge her reign. Unlike the endings of typical epics in which order is restored after evil is vanquished, “Dunciad” ends with the triumph of Dullness, ushering in the reign of Chaos.
In the section of “Dulcinea” entitled “The Carnation and the Butterfly,” Pope mocks even the science of his time, saying that it has no real meaning or connection to humanity but simply studies and collects that which is aesthetically pleasing. This scene depicts two amateur scientists who seek the judgment of Dullness to settle their feud, much like the biblical story of King Solomon. A gardener petitions Dullness to punish a butterfly collector for ruining his perfectly grown carnation. The butterfly collector's defense is that he paid no attention to the carnation when he destroyed it to capture the butterfly, “I meddle, Goddess! only in my sphere.” (line 432) Pope scorns this type of behavior as selfish and irresponsible, though Dullness, of course, praises both the “scientists,” for both have wasted their time in admiring the physical trivialities of the world rather than trying to discern any higher purpose. She further condemns those who would wonder about metaphysical or heavenly concepts, wishing man was made with better eyesight allowing him to study physical objects in better detail and therefore “See Nature in some partial narrow shape, / And let the Author of the whole escape.” (lines 455-456)
In the final section of “Dulcinea,” Dullness sends forth everyone who had come to witness her rising to power so that they may continue entertaining themselves rather than performing the duties of their positions. As she is about to decree more, she yawns and all of creation starts to fall asleep from overbearing dullness. As everything falls asleep, so too do the sciences disappear until only Night and Chaos are left with Dullness. Before the sciences vanish entirely however, they are greatly corrupted by Dullness, to the point where the most spiritual experiences are defined in terms of mathematics, and morality dies from this lack of higher purpose. With this final loss there is nothing left that can be said to be a part of humanity and Chaos is restored, extinguishing the light that was God's original creation so that all lies in “Universal Darkness.” (line 656)
Both Dryden and Pope are highly critical of their targets in their satires and both use the techniques of mock epic to ridicule their characters, who are clearly unbefitting of the high praise and lofty comparisons of the epic style. While they both disagreed with the same qualities in their contemporaries, and their satires are highly personal attacks on many of their colleagues, Dryden's is by far more personal. “Mac Flecknoe” expresses outright contempt for Dryden's former colleague, Thomas Shadwell while “Dunciad” expresses Pope's general disagreement with the society, education, politics, and religion of his time. Their criticism of their own society is abundantly clear in both cases, and their points are made while maintaining the wit which they mock their colleagues for not having.

Censorship: The Adversary of Integrity

Censorship has been an element of almost every society that has existed since the idea of free thought was first conceptualized. The language used by a community is a major factor in that community's social structure, and therefore the censorship of any form of media affects the ways in which the society develops. For as long as censorship has been involved in the development of cultures and communities, it has been a controversial issue.
In ancient times, censorship was used by those in power to control their societies by only allowing the general public access to certain information. Some of the most notable examples of this include the Catholic Church's repression of the astronomical discoveries of Copernicus and Galileo, which defied the Bible's representation of the the Universe. Not all censorship was intended to maliciously repress knowledge, however. In The Republic, Socrates encourages heavy censorship of art, music, and poetry in his theoretical Ideal State. The reason he gives for this is that these depictions of reality are inaccurate, and therefore inherently flawed. When an audience is subjected to these, they interpret them differently than they would the real objects they depict, and this can lead to a false view of reality (Plato, Book X). In this way, Socrates makes the greatest philosophical argument for censorship.
The problem with Socrates's view of censorship is that he bases it upon a society which has been very precisely structured to be a perfectly just aristocracy, and such a society has never existed. Rather, in democracies, like ancient Athens or modern America, each individual has the right to interpret reality in whatever way they choose, and is usually entitled to act in self-interest rather than the goals of the community (Plato, Book VIII). This is why one of the founding principles of the United States is that every citizen has the rights of freedom of speech, press, and peaceful assembly. Similar basic freedoms can be found in many of nations that proudly claim to uphold the values of individual rights and intellectual freedom. These simple rights have, and will forever continue to generate meaningful discourse and rational thought, which ultimately leads to the adaptation of social structures to better fulfill the needs of the population. Without them, societies resist natural change by replacing the value of individuality with that of conformity.
When those who have power in a society hold certain values, they fear a social change that could lead to the loss of their influence and the development of contrary ideals. In the communist country of China, all forms of media are heavily regulated and censored in order to “make sure content promotes and remains consistent with party doctrine,” (Zissis). According to the Chinese constitution, all citizens are granted the freedoms of speech and press, however they “must defend 'the security, honor, and interests of the motherland,'” (Zissis). These media controls are designed to uphold the values of those in power within China, giving them the power to quell any dissent that may be offered to their regime.
Similarly, though far less drastically, in America, different special-interest groups seek to impose media controls over the population to promote their own doctrines. Many extreme liberals and conservatives believe that some form of censorship is necessary in order to avoid offending people, but few can agree on what should be censored. While this censorship is certainly well-intentioned, it is not in the interest of the individuals in a society, but of certain groups with a particular set of values.
Religious groups tend to be very zealous regarding which values should be taught because theirs remain constant while the wants and needs of every society constantly change. Like the repression of the scientific discoveries of Galileo, certain Christian groups in America believe that evolution should not be taught in public schools despite the fact that there is no evidence which disproves this theory. Some “progressive” Christian groups feel that Intelligent Design, a theory who’s only support comes from a 2,000 year old work of fiction, should be taught alongside evolution in schools in the interest of “equality.” To add further insult to this repression of scientific knowledge, some Christian groups would like to control the availability of works of fiction which contain themes contrary to those found in their own fictional literature. Some of these themes include what Christians believe to be the Pagan influence of witchcraft, magic, and talking animals.
In America, the opposing side of this argument is equally vehement about the censorship of literature, though for different reasons. Rather than trying to protect our youth from “Pagan influence and immorality,” they are attempting to keep them from exposure to what they consider to be racist, sexist, or otherwise intolerant language and behavior. The irony of this, of course, lies in the fact that in censoring this material, they are sending the message that intolerance of certain material is acceptable so long as the material in question disagrees with the common beliefs held by society. This method very closely resembles the forced unity that is the goal of Communist China’s media controls. Some of the material that these groups consider offensive includes classic works of literature such as Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn and Maya Angelou’s I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings for racism, and Laura Ingals Wilder’s Little House on the Prairie for sexism. Anyone who is familiar with any of these works can immediately recognize the irony of censoring them for containing these themes. Both Twain and Angelou use the themes of racism to disprove the commonly accepted stereotypes of race that were held at the time, while the Little House series is designed to abolish sexist thought. Easily the worst among the examples of literature censorship is that of Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451, which portrays censorship as the catalyst which leads to a dystopian society in which free thought no longer exists.
Many other classic literary works are under attack or already banned from schools for containing material that is considered racist or sexist, even though these themes are historically accurate representations of commonly held beliefs. Among these are Harper's To Kill A Mockingbird, J.D. Salinger's Catcher in the Rye, and even The Diary of Anne Frank. Some parents do not want these books being used in schools because they feel that exposure to these themes will teach their children bad habits such as intolerance for other ethnicites or religions. When these books are properly taught, the students should understand the injustice of prejudice, and the values of acceptance and rational thought.
Racism and sexism are not the only topics that many parents consider too controversial for their children to read. Edward B. Jenkinson's list of the 25 most common reasons for the banning of books includes many themes that do not relate to prejudice, but rather to free thought and non-conformity. The list includes:
“Children questioning authority of parents and other authority figures,... Works that do not champion the work ethic, Books that do not promote patriotism, Negative statements about parents, authority, US traditions, … Books promoting self-awareness, self-understanding, Books promoting critical thinking,” (Winkler 49).

Parents are growing increasingly more concerned about the ability of their children to make their own competent decisions, and so tell them not to question the authority figures. Questioning authority is a theme that appears in one form or another in the majority of literary works. The removal of these works from schools would leave children with very little ability to reason on their own, and would be significantly detrimental to their overall education.
In addition to questioning authority, racism, and sexism, some parents seek to ban books from middle and high schools for examples of situations that teenagers may face and should be knowledgeable about. The biggest “threats” these books contain are scenes dealing with sexual issues. This may include anything from safe-sex and homosexuality, to more complex issues such as teen-pregnancy and abortion. One such book that is highly unpopular among parents is Robert Cormier's The Chocolate War, which ranked number four on the American Library Association's ten most frequently challenged books of 2005 due to its sexual content and use of profanity. While parents tend to disprove of this kind of literature in schools, it is exactly the type of writing in which today's adolescents are interested. By banning books like these which actually capture the attention of adolescents, parents are slowly destroying the literature experience for future generations. Since this age group tends to find many classic works of literature boring, “There is more to be gained by gently luring them to these [Cormier's] books rather than trying to cram a lifetime's experience with reading into six years because 'it may be the only opportunity they have,'” (Redmond 92).
Writer Judy Blume also receives heavy criticism from parents for her books which are targeted mainly at middle school aged children. Her works often include real-world problems that children may be undergoing such as divorce or domestic abuse. These themes make her books highly popular among children because they “give the impression of being derived not from the recreation of closely observed individuals but from the fleshing out of general life processes derived from the statistics of contemporary psychology,” (Garber 56-57). In other words, her books are so popular among children because they are, as one avid 11-year-old reader describes them: “'about life the way it really is,'” (Garber 56). Most of her adolescent books contain endings in which the main characters, who had previously undergone stressful challenges, return to the course of their daily lives. Despite their optimism and uplifting morals, the books of Judy Blume, most noticeably Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret, are still being taken off school library shelves across America.
The Harry Potter series, another set of books that is incredibly popular among youth in America, is also objected to by many groups which feel that it is having a negative impact on children. The same Christian groups which protest the teaching of evolution as “only a theory,” would like to see the Harry Potter series removed from libraries because they feel it has a Pagan influence on children and promotes an interest in the occult. Author Judy Blume comments on this phenomenon in a New York Times editorial: “In my books, it's reality that's seen as corrupting. With Harry Potter, the perceived danger is fantasy.” (Blume 456) This comment illustrates the utter failure of trying to appease the population by censoring unfavorable material: everything is unfavorable to someone. Other than this the only thing any of these “controversial” books have in common is that their authors spent a great deal of time and effort in producing them so that the readers could be entertained and briefly perceive the world from a new perspective.
The overall goal of any form of censorship is to control media, and by extension control those influenced by the media by focusing their perception upon the goals of those in control. The majority of groups that seek to impose their own views on others through some form of censorship believe that this control is necessary because people are generally incapable of coexisting peacefully without it. Each time a form of media is censored, the ability of future generations to shape their own societies based on their needs is hindered. Whether the goal is to fight racism, sexism, wavering obedience to authority, smut, or religious doctrines, censorship in any form is immoral, and enemy of all intellectual freedom.

Works Cited
Blume, Judy. “Is Harry Potter Evil?” Exploring Language 11th Edition. Ed. Gary Goshgarion, Longman Press, 2007. 456-457. Print.
Garber, Stephen M. “Judy Blume: New Classicism for Kids.” The English Journal, Vol. 73, No. 4 (April 1984). Pages 56-59. Found at: http://www.jstor.org/stable/816587?seq=2&Search=yes&term=blume&term=judy&list=hide&searchUri=/action/doBasicSearch%3FQuery%3Djudy%2Bblume%26gw%3Djtx%26prq%3Djudy%2Bblumr%26Search%3DSearch%26hp%3D25%26wc%3Don&item=1&ttl=599&returnArticleService=showArticle&resultsServiceName=doBasicResultsFromArticle
Plato. The Republic. Ed. Andrea Tschemplik, Rowman & Littlefield Publishers, Inc, 2005. 420 pages. Print.
Redmond, Judith K. “Young Adult Literature: Is There Life After Judy Blume?” The English Journal, Vol. 71, No. 3 (March, 1982). Pages 92-94. Found at: http://www.jstor.org/stable/817046?seq=1&Search=yes&term=blume&term=judy&list=hide&searchUri=/action/doBasicSearch%3FQuery%3Djudy%2Bblume%26gw%3Djtx%26prq%3Djudy%2Bblumr%26Search%3DSearch%26hp%3D25%26wc%3Don&item=2&ttl=599&returnArticleService=showArticle&resultsServiceName=doBasicResultsFromArticle
Winkler, Lisa K. “Celebrate Democracy! Teach About Censorship.” The English Journal, Vol. 94, No. 5 (May, 2005). Pages 48-51. Found at: http://www.jstor.org/stable/30047353? &Search=yes&term="Lisa+K.+Winkler"&list=hide&searchUri=/action/doBasicSearch %3FSearch%3DSearch%26Query%3Dau:%2522Lisa%2520K.%2520Winkler %2522&item=1&ttl=1&returnArticleService=showArticle
Zissis, Carin. “Media Censorship in China.” Council on Foreign Relations. Found at: http://www.cfr.org/publication/11515/#p2

Ideal State

This was the final project for a philosophy class I took which covered The Republic. The teacher wanted us to lay out our ideal society in some form other than a report so mine is a fake anthropologist's description of a perfect society which he recently encountered.

Throughout my long career as an anthropologist I have traveled the globe in order to see the world from as many cultural perspectives as possible. All this time I have tried to remain unbiased and scholarly when entering in to a new culture, but after my decade-long excursion to the island kingdom of Eumetis I can accurately declare that there exists a society which is superior to all others. As a cultural anthropologist with over 40 years' worth of field experience, I tell you there is no other place on Earth which breeds the values of freedom and intellectualism equal to Eumetis.
The underlying foundation on which this utopia of intellect was devised is the principle that proper education and upbringing is the key to unlocking the potential of future generations. With this goal in mind, Eumetis's legendary founder Tate set out to devise an education system that would allow children to critically analyze and interpret the events of their daily lives, making them unknowingly add to their own educations with every passing thought. Eumetis's education system starts teaching children at the age of four with lesson plans similar to those of private schools in the United States or Britain, but also includes a heavy emphasis on music appreciation and performance. At the age of six the children continue their educations, but with an added emphasis on physical art and reading and writing skills. At this age children are taught to read with allegories which promote learning and free thought as well as the basic moral principles which parents are indebted to teach to children at home.
Moral values are taught to the children both at home and in early schooling with these allegories, and every child must pass a test of situations in which morals are examined (sort of like a Choose-Your-Own Allegory) in order to complete their basic education. Children who do not pass this test are psychologically examined and asked why they responded as they did. The psychologist may then pass the child upon completing the evaluations, or send the child to be re-educated in moral values and made to re-take the test.
One allegory that is children learn when learning to read is about a city that thought it was so smart, that they kicked out all the craftsmen and laborers. The citizens of this imaginary city are industrious and invent many new and wonderful things, but they quickly run out of food and clothes. When winter comes around, they have nobody to build the efficient new power plants they designed, and nobody to run the old ones which were at least satisfactory enough to provide light and heat. The moral of this story is that all cities are built from the ground up, and when the workers on the bottom are removed, those on the top will fall with them.
Another allegory that is taught at the same age teaches them not to cheat or take credit for another's work. The story is about a child who completes his education by copying the work of others and eventually earns a well-respected position in the field of nuclear physics with his colleague who was unknowingly cheated off of. Once day when his colleague is out, a major meltdown occurs and the cheater is unable to do anything to stop it, causing the deaths of thousands of people. The moral of this story is that every position comes with responsibility, and it is dangerous to everyone for an individual to have responsibilities for which they are not qualified.
At the age of seven the Eumetis educational system begins to differ from those of “civilized” societies. Basic math is introduced to the children and a heavy emphasis is placed on reading and writing skills both in school and at home, culminating in the a majority children's ability to read at an advanced level by the end of the year. At eight years old children are taught critical analysis and interpretation of literature and strongly encouraged to view the music and art they have learned until then with the same techniques. Throughout the whole year of which a child is nine, he will learn very little of what is considered practical knowledge. Instead he will learn to question all the knowledge he has and will learn through the use of logic and rationality, in addition to rhetoric so he can better communicate. By the age of ten, Eumetian children are able to reason and debate rationally better than the majority of American college students.
From the age of 10 until 16, education of music, art, and literature decreases, that of critical analysis and logic remain constant, and more and more emphasis is placed on math, sciences, geometry, geography, and physics each year. At 16 children must pass both a standardized education test, and perform satisfactory on a ethics exam to graduate. Upon graduation children are free to decide whether they will continue their formal education in specific areas, or take up a trade as a profession in order to benefit the community. While heavy emphasis is placed on education and intellect in all of Eumetian society, many children who enjoy using their hands for art and music in school become fine craftsmen, able to turn even the simplest of commodities in to art. Those that choose to be craftsmen train for an additional four to ten years under masters of the craft before they are considered true craftsmen. At this point they are accepted in to the guild of their chosen profession and given the same social status as members of academic guilds.
Those that chose to continue their formal education find themselves introduced to the world's greatest community of scholars and teachers. Until the age of 20 they undergo general academic training in a wide variety of fields in order to determine which path to follow. In some cases, especially gifted individuals may be asked by a guild to study mainly in their field of expertise, and the four year period is lessened. Once a particular field is chosen, individuals study in this field an additional five to 20 years depending on their level of intelligence and educational goals. After this time they are considered official members of an academic guild. In Eumetian society a member of a guild is considered an expert in their field and holds high social status. One step above guild members, however, are the masters of the guild whose job it is to manage the affairs of the entire guild and represent them in the senate. These masters are generally very experience in their trade since they have practiced it so long. They take on the responsibilities of the guild in addition to their regular duties as a practitioner of the skill. Each guild is entitled to make its own laws regarding the election of guild masters, but many appoint masters or hold elections within the guild.
One step on the social ladder above guild masters are those that no longer practice their profession, but teach it to the apprentices. These very experienced teachers are relieved of the responsibilities of practicing their craft so that they may devote all of their time to their students' education. Teachers are given such high status because they pass on not only the standard practices of the profession, but also first-hand accounts of real world experiences. Teachers have very little actual power in the Eumetian society, but they are highly respected for passing on their knowledge to the next generation.
One unusual aspect of society which keeps everyone productive is the lower social status that entertainer have compared to craftsmen and laborers. Musicians, actors, writers, artists, and prostitutes (which are legal but not in very high demand) all have their own guilds and are represented in the senate, but they have less social status than those of equal standing in other guilds because they do not feed any necessary aspect of the society, but rather its appetites. Masters of entertainment are considered on the same level as regular members of labor or professional guilds, and teachers of entertainment are equal to masters of other guilds. This does not mean, however, that entertainers are not appreciated or in low demand in Eumetis. During my excursion to the island I was fortunate enough to witness and help coordinate Eumetis's first ever cultural celebration, during which original representations of cultural art, music, and literature was displayed and the Guild of Culinary Delights made over 6,000 different dishes from around the world. The festival was such a success that it was extended for a full week instead of its planned 3 days, and morale and work ethic of the entire society was greatly increased for weeks after.
The Eumetian senate is possibly the most fascinating demonstration of politics that exists. Senate is held once a month to decide how best to spend the taxes and occasionally, when knew knowledge is discovered, discusses the creation of a new guild. Each guild chooses two Masters to represent them in the senate, which is often a massive debate between multiple groups of guilds. Each guild is allowed to make a proposal for how money should be spent, and since all are trained in rhetoric and rational thought at a young age, these debates never devolve to name-calling or petty arguments but remain focused on the important issues. Senate also lasts multiple days and in such cases a board of Judicators from the Guild of Seekers for Truth and Penitence volunteers to mediate the debate from an unbiased perspective.
The Guild of Seekers for Truth and Penitence are the entire criminal justice system of Eumetis. The penitentiary system of Eumetis is one devoted to reform, rather than retribution., giving them practically no repeat offenders. Offenders are made to see the psychological or physical pain their actions have caused their victims and their friends and families. They are made to attend both personal psychologists and group therapy with those who were harmed by their crimes. If an offender commits more than one violent crime, he is marooned on a neighboring island and given no provisions. Offenders who commit three non-violent crimes are brought to a nearby society and left there to live however they chose so long as they do not return to Eumetis. These people generally mix with the more advanced modern societies and perform very capably.
The Guild of Seekers for Truth and Penitence are responsible for processing the trial of those accused of crimes and for taking care of those convicted. After being apprehended by the guards, criminals are given over to the Seekers for holding, and two Seekers are randomly selected to compose a case for, and three against the accused, including compiling a list of witnesses. Before this, other Seekers who specialize in the collection and analysis of crime scene data compile factual reports on materials found on the crime scene, which can be used by the Seekers representing the defense and the prosecution. The prosecution opens the court when all the evidence has been compiled, and argues to a panel of seven randomly selected Judicators, who then have blind vote to determine the outcome. If the defendant has been found guilty, he is given back over to the Seekers who then schedule his reformation process or perform his exiling.
Personal life in Eumetian society is vastly different from any other that exists on Earth. Upon reaching adulthood and graduating “basic” education at the age of 16, each Eumetian is required to donate a sample of their sperm or eggs to the state's genetics department. At this time each citizen who completes the basic education is granted basic rights which protect their freedom of expression and rights which concern fair trials. After this they are free to engage in whatever personal relationships they chose, whether for pleasure or reproductive purposes. This includes homosexuality and mutli-partner relationships, which can become legally binding marriages. All sexual relationships, heterosexual,homosexual, and multiparty most be consented to by all involved and all must have reached adulthood. Marriages and divorces are another minor duty of the Judicators, and therefore marriage is an institution solely of the state which may pass no judgment on marriage save that a party involved does not agree.
A family would consist of groups of people bound by marriage and their offspring. Partners could have as many children as they want so long as they can provide for those children. Adoption is strongly suggested and is one of the reasons donations of sperm and eggs are required. Barring unforeseen accidents, there are no children without parents, so when partners decide to adopt they may ask to use their own donated samples, or specify a set of skills which they would like their child to have. Samples are then chosen, with the donors' permission, to genetically predetermine the child to the specified skill. Once the donors give their permission for the samples to be used, they have no say in any aspect of how the child is raised, but they may receive information about important events in the child's life (career choice, marriages, etc) if they wish.
Partners who divorce must make arrangements for their children upon divorcing and are still required to provide for these children until they reach adulthood. These children may be raised by any parent involved in the marriage (arrangements made upon divorce) or if the child has reached a significant level of training and shows proficiency in a particular set of skills, a guild may ask to adopt the child and raise it as a guild member of that particular trade if the parents agree. Children raised by a guild are not required to choose that trade as their profession, but are strongly encouraged to and given slightly higher social status among the members of the guild for being raised among them. The guild may withdraw their invitation if the child does not prove to be talented in their trade, but must still raise the child until it comes of age.
Genetic samples are also used by the state to maintain a base of genetically superior laborers. The Guild of Genetic Craftsmanship which handles all donated samples of sperm and eggs, breeds children based on a family history of physical strength and dexterity, work ethic, and minimal criminal activity. Laborers are educated in the same way as regular children until they reach adulthood at 16. At this time they are taken out of classes and instructed in various fields of labor including mining, farming, animal training, grounds keeping, guardian training, and other basic aspects which society requires. Guild laborers are given the same social status as craftsmen or academic guild members, and can even be revered as heroes. Mos notably among these is Luz Rouh, the Eumetian miner who lead a successful expedition in to a volcano on a neighboring island to create forge within the crater where metal can be worked in lava by master blacksmiths. Since the making of the the Vulcan Forge, Eumetis has seen a dramatic rise in its labor force as many non-genetically altered children chose to provide labor rather than continue their educations.
Since a high regard is placed on the collection and creation of knowledge in Eumetis, many members of certain guilds chose to travel the world and collect and add to knowledge pertaining to their field in other societies. In doing this they can gain understanding of things that they would otherwise never have learned on remote Eumetis. They also collect as many scholarly and literary works as they can find regarding their area of expertise. When they return to Eumetis they add these to the massive library which is the heart of the Eumetian society. Many also write their own scholarly articles or journals which are also added to the library. It is the job of the guild's teachers to remain up to date with the knowledge brought from outside Eumetis and synthesize this information in to their teachings. This lust for higher learning and the continual development of intelligence breeds a constant friendly competition between all individuals in Eumetian society. They attempt to out-do one another at all times, but very rarely does this turn in to actual feuds between individuals or guilds.
Since Eumetis is the largest island in a relatively small chain of volcanic islands, they make use of the other islands to test their constantly developing intelligence. One of the medium sized islands is used entirely by the Guild of Aeronautics and Astrophysics (a rapidly growing guild) to build, test, and pilot their creations. Another smaller island is used by the Guild of Genetic Craftsmanship to breed livestock and plant life for maximum production. On this island there are fruit trees which are hundreds of years old and have the fruits of other trees spliced in to the branches. The famous 175 year old pomegranate tree which the Eumetian people call Perseperum produces apples, oranges, lemons, pears, plums, and cherries, in addition to massive quantities of pomegranates each season. A very small island is a chemist's amusement park where imported chemicals are combined in endless combinations to create new polymers built for strength and light weight. Even the volcano in which Vulcan Forge was made has been chiseled and sculpted to resemble a massive living flame when viewed from afar.
If anywhere in the world can be said to be a true paradise it is the island of Eumetis. Here is a society which exists peacefully and reasonably to makes advancing in all fields of learning so that everyone may benefit from the discoveries made. Any scholar's dream would be to be accepted in to Eumetian society and revered as an equal among these intellectual giants. If they had been instilled with the values of possessions and power they could likely develop weapons which would easily compensate for their small numbers, but they among the most peaceful and friendly of people. Throughout my long career I can honestly say that I have never felt the need to retire from field work until spending time among the Eumetians. This article should double as my resignation from the field of cultural anthropology as the world knows it, as I have chosen to gratefully accept the position of honorary teacher of anthropology in the recently developed Guild of the Endeavors of Humanity. I publish this last article to the so-called civilized world only so you know that there exists a society which defies all contemporary social models in the interests of intellectual freedom for the advancement of the human species.

Terraforming Mars Through the Use of Greenhouse Gases

This was originally a formal analytical report which I wrote for a technical communications class. More research was put in to this report than in anything I have ever written, though my teacher seemed to think that my sources are not credible and that the whole idea was impossible and "science fiction." There were originally a few images withing the text, but I cannot figure out how to upload them to my satisfaction on this site. The captions for the images are still present within the text, so hopefully you can use the links in the captions to find the pictures.

INTRODUCTION

The idea of space exploration and colonization has captivated the human race ever since we could first imagine a place outside of Earth. When Neil Armstrong became the first person to step foot on the Moon in 1969, the whole world watched him say that now famous line: “That's one small step for man; one giant leap for mankind.” Now, with our home planet rapidly approaching its own carrying capacity* for human life, we must make what is possibly the biggest step in human history and become a multi-planet species.

Of course, we do not currently have the technology needed to sustain life for millions in either orbital satellites* or bases on other celestial* bodies. What we do already have, however, is the capability to take a powerful natural force and wield it to begin to make Mars a permanently habitable place for human life. This force is, of course, is the Greenhouse Effect (See Appendix A).

In recent years, scientists have noticed that an increase in our planet's surface temperature has lead to climate changes throughout the world. Some of the most drastic changes include: “Glaciers are melting, plants and animals are being forced from their habitat, and the number of severe storms is increasing.” (An Inconvenient Truth) Why is our planet suddenly undergoing these massive climate changes after millions of years of relative stability? Most scientists today believe that it is because of the rapid increase in our production of greenhouse gases* (An Inconvenient Truth). At this point, you may be asking yourself, “What does any of this have to do with living on Mars?” The answer to this question is simple: the very principles that make it dangerous for us to use CFCs* and burn fossil fuels (An Inconvenient Truth) here on Earth, are what will allow the human race to turn Mars from a dead frozen planet, into one capable of supporting life.

Since a project of this magnitude has never been completed in human history, any timetable given would, of course, be purely hypothetical. The number of possible variables is so staggering that it would be completely unethical for me to present an accurate time line for the completion of this project. Therefore, I have decided to comprehensively cover:

• The specific greenhouse gases that should be used for maximum efficiency
• All stages involved in raising the Martian surface temperature with greenhouse gases
• How to release these gases into the Martian atmosphere*

Since I am obviously not a qualified expert in any of the fields involved in this project, the information I have compiled in this report comes from a wide array of astronomers, environmental scientists, geologists, astrobiologists*, chemists, and physicists.

COLLECTED DATA

Different Greenhouse Gases
The amount of greenhouse gases in any planet's atmosphere is one of the biggest factors in determining how much of heat will remain with that planet, and how much will be lost to space (Refer to Appendix A). We now know that carbon dioxide (CO2) is a powerful greenhouse gas, but there are also many others, both natural and man-made, which vary in their effectiveness.

Natural Greenhouse Gases
Many of the gases that are naturally in our atmosphere function as greenhouse gases. Possibly the most well-known of these is carbon dioxide.

CO2 Carbon dioxide is a gas which is found throughout our solar system and is possibly the gas that has had the biggest impact on the formation of life on Earth due to its large role in the Greenhouse Effect. Carbon dioxide is especially prevalent on Mars, composing about 95% of the Red Planet's atmosphere (Darling). Why then is Mars not a warm, inhabitable planet if its atmosphere is made up of mostly carbon dioxide? Scientists believe that Mars was once a place capable of supporting life, but somehow underwent a reverse Greenhouse Effect, cooling the planet enough to literally freeze a large amount of this carbon dioxide into dry ice (Darling). When the majority of the planets gaseous carbon dioxide became dry ice,* the atmosphere thinned significantly, reducing the effectiveness of the Greenhouse Effect. It is therefore believed, that an increase of as little as 4 degrees Celsius would be enough to evaporate much of this dry ice, allowing it to rejoin the Martian atmosphere and once again add to the Greenhouse Effect (Hurtak).

H2O Water vapor also works as a greenhouse gas. On Earth, it is estimated water vapor contributes to roughly 60% of our Greenhouse Effect, compared to only 20% by carbon dioxide. (Uherek) This is because the Earth is made up mostly of water. On planets with less water, water vapor plays much less of a part in the Greenhouse Effect. For instance, on Mars, though there is an abundance of water throughout the planet, most of it is permanently frozen as ice, and therefore very little of it exists in the atmosphere as water vapor (Mars, Water On). However, both Earth-based and Mars-orbiting telescopes have determined that water vapor exists in small amounts on Mars in the forms of clouds and fog (Mars, Water On). It is believed that once Mars is made warmer, much of the ice that exists all over the planet will melt into water, forming massive oceans, much like we have on Earth.

CH4 Methane is another important natural greenhouse gas both on Earth and Mars. While both water vapor and carbon dioxide are cycled constantly through the water and carbon cycles, methane remains in a planet's atmosphere for only about 9 to 15 years before being broken down by radiation from the Sun (EPA). However, methane is also more than 20 times more effective than carbon dioxide as a greenhouse gas over a hundred year period (EPA). On Earth, the majority of methane is produced through the decomposition of dead plants and animals. A significant increase in the amount of methane on our planet in recent years is linked to human activities such as coal mining, agricultural production, and landfills (EPA). Trace amounts of the Earth's total methane production comes from volcanic activity. While Mars does contain several volcanoes (including Olympos Mons, the largest volcano in our solar system) other gases, such as sulfur, which are discharged during volcanic activity are not found on Mars, leading to much debate over the Red Planet's recent methane production (BBC News).

Man-Made Greenhouse Gases
While our planet evolved to the comfortable temperature it is today through natural greenhouse gases, this process took millions, if not billions of years to occur naturally. It is completely unacceptable for humans to wait that long for the Greenhouse Effect to transform Mars into a habitable place for us. Since we are now just learning about the effects of releasing too many greenhouse gases into our own atmosphere, it has been theorized that the introduction of just a few of these man-made greenhouse gases could cause a runaway greenhouse effect on Mars, changing the whole planet's climate in a much shorter time period. Many of the man-made greenhouse gases whose use has been restricted on Earth because of environmental hazards will help drastically shorten the time-period involved in warming Mars through the Greenhouse Effect.

CFCs Chlorofluorocarbons are any gasses with a mixture of chlorine, fluorine, and carbon. Developed in the 1930s, CFCs have an incredible array of desirable traits. They are non-toxic, non-flammable, and non-reactive with other chemical compounds (CIESIN). Also, their stable thermodynamic principles allow them to be easily converted from gas to liquid, or liquid to gas, making them perfect for use as a coolant in refrigerators, air conditioners, and aerosol propellants (Hopwood). CFCs by themselves are not particularly powerful greenhouse gases. They do, however, add to the Greenhouse Effect by breaking down ozone* (O3) in the atmosphere. The Ozone Layer around the Earth helps filter excess radiation, specifically ultraviolet radiation (UV), from the Sun. When CFCs interact with radiation from the Sun, they rise into the upper atmosphere of the planet and react with the ozone, disintegrating the CFCs and converting the ozone into oxygen (O2), which does not filter ultraviolet radiation (Khemani). This adds to the Greenhouse Effect because more radiation from sunlight is then making it to the Earth's surface and being trapped by other greenhouse gases in the atmosphere. Because of this, CFCs can be used to raise a planet's temperature, but are not ideal.

HFC*s Hydrofluorcarbons are similar to chlorofluorocarbons in that they are composed of fluorine and carbon, but rather than having chlorine like CFCs, HFCs have hydrogen. Used in refrigerators and air conditioners, HFCs have many of the same properties as CFCs and so are often used as a substitute. The main difference between HFCs and CFCs is that HFCs do not react with ozone (Hopwood). They are, however, more powerful as greenhouse gases than CFCs, and because of this, they are regulated almost as strictly as CFCs themselves. While this may be a problem here on planet Earth, HFCs are ideal for use in increasing the Greenhouse Effect on Mars because they do not deplete ozone, and are anywhere from 4,000 to 10,000 times as effective as carbon dioxide as a greenhouse gas (Greenhouse Gases: Some Definitions).

PFC*s Perfluorcarbons are incredibly potent greenhouse gases that are mostly produced as byproducts of aluminum smelting (Greenhouse Gases: Some Definitions). PFCs are composed solely of different combinations of fluorine and carbon, both of which are key components of the majority of potent greenhouse gases. While they have many of the same properties and uses as CFCs and HFCs, they are more expensive to produce, and as a result are not used as commercially. One specific PFC, perfluoropropane (C3F8), is currently regarded by astrobiologists as one of the ideal greenhouse gases to be used on Mars (Young). It has a lifespan of 2,600 years, does not react with ozone, and is 7,000 times more effective as a greenhouse gas than carbon dioxide (Perflurocarbons [PFCs]).

Methods of Releasing Greenhouse Gases Into Martian Atmosphere

There are many proposed methods of releasing greenhouse gases into Mars' atmosphere. Each method would potentially release different types of greenhouse gases, and therefore a combination of all would likely be the most effective and produce the greatest results.

Drilling to Release Water Vapor Many astronomers today believe that while liquid water no longer exists on the surface of Mars, it may remain under the surface where high pressure and proximity to the planet's core may have kept it from freezing (See Figure 1) (David).


Figure 1 Cross Section of Martian Surface
Source: “The Quest to Terraform Mars.” by: D.M. Hurtak, M.S.Sc. The Academy for Future Science. Retrieved November 22, 2009 from http://www.affs.org/html/the_quest_to_terraform_mars.html

When these pockets of liquid water are drilled into, the high pressure will cause the hot water to shoot to the planet's surface, hopefully evaporating some of Mars' frozen carbon dioxide on the way. Even if no other frozen greenhouse gases are released back into the atmosphere, water vapor will certainly be released from this process, (Hurtak) and the liquid water which will pool on Mars' surface will be constantly recycled throughout the planet due to the Water Cycle. If there are not sufficient amount of liquid water under Mars' frozen surface, drilling could also encounter pockets of trapped greenhouse gases that could be released into the atmosphere (Hurtak).

Orbital Mirrors One method of releasing greenhouse gases into Mars' atmosphere is to warm the Red Planet's south pole in order to melt the dry ice polar caps that have formed. Doing so will release a large amount of carbon dioxide gas into Mars' atmosphere, thickening it by a significant amount. One way of melting this ice cap is to build mirrors which would orbit around mars and redirect sunlight at the Martian south pole. The problems with this plan, of course, are size, cost, and material limitations due to the enormous size the mirrors would have to be in order to be effective. It is estimated that a mirror with a radius of 125 kilometers would be sufficient to melt the area below the latitude of 70 degrees south, but that such a mirror, if made out of a light-weight aluminum-mylar material, would weigh close to 200,000 tons (Zubrin). Such a monstrosity would have to be made in space, as it would weigh far too much to launch from Earth. If the mirrors could be made from ores mined and refined on Mars, their transportation would be a far simpler issue.

Asteroid* Impact The alternative plan for quickly melting Mars' south pole ice cap would be to capture an asteroid and impact the south pole with it. The friction from such an impact would certainly melt the ice cap, but may provide difficulties with the resulting clouds of dust that could develop following the massive impact. The asteroid would most likely have to be captured from the outer solar system, rather than from the nearby asteroid belt, because it would require less force to move an object in the outer solar system since it is farther away from the sun and therefore less affected by its gravity (See Figure 2) (Zubrin)


Figure 2 Velocity Change Required to Transport Asteroids to Mars
Source: “Technological Requirements for Terraforming Mars.” by: Robert M. Zubrin and Christopher P. McKay. Retrieved November 22, 2009 from http://www.users.globalnet.co.uk/~mfogg/zubrin.htm

To make this plan truly effective, an asteroid made largely of ammonia is required as ammonia is a strong greenhouse gas. When the asteroid impacts the southern pole, not only does the frozen carbon dioxide and water melt, but the ammonia from the asteroid also becomes a part of the atmosphere, aiding in the Greenhouse Effect. It is estimated that a single asteroid consisting of 10 billion tons of ammonia would be enough to melt 1 trillion tons of water, raise the entire planet's temperature by 3 degrees Celsius, and additionally, form an ammonia shield that would protect the planet from UV radiation (Zubrin). Since the average lifespan of ammonia is slightly less than a hundred years, more asteroids would need to be imported to Mars in order for this plan to work by itself. This is certainly the fastest method devised for bringing Mars' surface temperature to a habitable level, but it also involves the most amount of risk since each 10 billion ton asteroid would impact the Martian surface with the amount of force of 70,000 megaton hydrogen bombs; (Zubrin) making it almost impossible for there to be any kind of habitation while the process of impacting Mars with asteroids is still going on.

Martian Industrialization A far safer method of releasing greenhouse gases into Mars' atmosphere would be to set up factories that actually create the greenhouse gases on Mars. The main purpose of these factories would be to produce a mixture of CFCs, HFCs, and PFCs which are then released into the atmosphere where they will add to the Greenhouse Effect. This is a more reasonable approach to introducing man-made greenhouse gases to Mars than simply developing them on Earth and transporting them to Mars for several reasons. First, a very large quantity of these gases will be needed in order to quickly produce a noticeable temperature difference and the transportation of such large quantities is unrealistic due to costs and the amount of travel time involved. Second, Establishing factories on Mars before it is ready for human habitation allows us to begin readying the planet for our future occupation. This means there will be minimal time wasted in setting up our habitats once Mars is ready to support life. There are a few different options to consider while determining how best to power these factories since there are no fossil fuels, and there will be limited other resources available for our use on Mars. One possibility it to create nuclear power plants on Mars which will run these factories, and can eventually be used to power other devices. The drawback to this, however, is that thousands of workers are currently needed to run a single nuclear power plant, (Zubrin) and therefore, temporary human habitats would need to be set up, either in orbit or on the surface. Another way of powering the factories is with a combination of solar and wind power. Since we are just now beginning to understand how to effectively tame reusable energy sources, it may be a good idea to invest in as many reusable sources of energy as possible for use on Mars. The downfalls of this idea are the high costs and low amounts of energy generated compared to nuclear reactors.

Methane Producing Organisms Once Mars has been changed enough to support life for even the most basic life forms, primitive bacteria can be imported from Earth in order to organically produce a variety of greenhouse gases including carbon, methane, and ammonia. The recent discovery of methane on Mars suggests that some form of methanogens* may already exist and be producing methane from deep below the Martian surface (Darling). Methanogens are anaerobic*, meaning they can live without oxygen, but being fairly strict anaerobes, they do not survive for very long in environments rich in oxygen. On Earth, they are found living and thriving in some of the most extreme environments, including volcanic hot springs, oceanic volcanic vents, swamps and marshes, and even the stomachs and intestines of humans, cows, and termites (Meeres). Being some of the oldest organisms on Earth, methanogens have adapted to these extreme environments and the many different species of methanogens can be classified based on their environmental preferences. There are: thermophilic*, psychrophilic*, halophilic*, acidophilic*, alkaliphilic*, and hyperthermophilic* (Meeres). The ability of methanogens to live in extreme conditions makes them ideal candidates for introduction to Mars while it is still incapable of supporting more complex life.

Stages of Terraforming Process

While there are a multitude of different plans for terraforming Mars with greenhouse gases, it will be a long and difficult process, possibly taking centuries before humans can live unaided on Mars. The Red Planet will change drastically as the different plans are put into effect, and each major change will allow humans to utilize a different method to make the planet habitable.

Current Stage Mars is uninhabitable right now for several different reasons. The atmosphere is about one percent as dense as Earth's, resulting in a surface pressure which is less than one percent of that on Earth (Darling). This thin atmosphere, although made up almost entirely of carbon dioxide, does not effectively use the Greenhouse Effect, trapping only about 5ºC (Darling). The average Martian temperature is -55ºC, but because of Mars' very elliptical orbit, the temperature changes drastically from -133ºC to 27ºC (Darling). Both the north and south Martian poles contain water ice and dry ice, the amounts of which change depending on the season (Darling). It is estimated that a 4ºC raise in Mars' atmosphere would begin a process that would eventually lead to the 55ºC change required for liquid water to exist (Hurtak).

Orbital Mirror and Asteroid Impact Stage The first step to terraforming Mars is to raise the temperature and thicken the atmosphere so that both are similar to the atmosphere of Earth. Any change in the temperature or the density of the Martian atmosphere will cause the other to change as the two factors strongly affect one another because of the Greenhouse Effect. Of the plans covered in this report, the Asteroid Impact and the Orbital Mirror plans are the two most effective and drastic plans. They should therefore, be the first methods used. Construction of a massive mirror should be started within Earth's orbit while an asteroid composed of mostly ammonia is located. The mirror would have to built in space rather than on Earth because it would be too massive to reach the escape velocity required to be free of Earth's gravity. (Zubrin). It would take a great deal of time to find a single asteroid of the proper size (roughly 5 billion tons) and composition in the outer reaches of our solar system, and even more time to capture and redirect one. While an asteroid near to the orbits of Uranus or Neptune would be much easier to move due to their distance from the sun, they would also take longer to arrive at Mars, in some cases up to 50 years (Zubrin). This long period of preparation time would allow for the construction and positioning of the orbital mirror, which would be working to evaporate the water and carbon dioxide ice at Mars' poles, thickening the atmosphere with these two greenhouse gases. As the asteroid impact is a chaotic and potentially dangerous method, the next stages of the terraforming process cannot be launched until after the impact, by which time Mars will already have undergone drastic changes.

Industrialization Stage The impact from an asteroid composed of about 5 billion tons of ammonia is estimated to be enough to melt half a trillion tons of water and raise Mars' surface temperature by 1.5ºC (Zubrin). This plus the amount of carbon dioxide and water evaporated by the orbital mirror will have increased the density of the atmosphere, increasing the surface pressure and the amount of heat trapped in Mars' atmosphere through the Greenhouse Effect. Immediately after the asteroid impact is the ideal time to start the Industrialization plan because the amount of ammonia in the atmosphere from the impact will block UV rays for a little less than a century (Zubrin). Any humans on the planet would still have to wear space suits to combat the low pressure, temperature, and lack of oxygen, but they would not have to worry about being exposed to excess radiation from the sun. When humans arrive on Mars for this step of the process, they should immediately begin assembling the power sources that will be used. With the recent advancements being made in the field of reusable energy, wind or solar power will likely be the main sources of energy on Mars. If this technology has not advanced to the level where it would adequately meet the requirement for use on Mars, then nuclear reactors would have to be built. Reusable energy sources are more desirable than nuclear reactors because they require less maintenance, cutting down on the amount of people required to live on Mars before it inhabitable and the costs involved in transporting, compensating, and providing livable conditions for these workers. Once power sources have been established on Mars, factories whose main purpose would be to release CFCs, HFCs, and PFCs into the atmosphere should be set up. With enough of these factories steadily producing these powerful greenhouse gases, Mars could be transformed into a warm and wet planet in less than a century (Zubrin). When combined with the other methods of releasing greenhouse gases into the atmosphere, fewer factories producing lower amounts of CFCs, HFCs, and PFCs would be needed. Since fewer greenhouse gas producing factories would be needed, some factories could be setup to manufacture drilling equipment in preparation for the next stage. This Industrialization Stage would require a great deal of planning, including massive amounts of training in order to prepare non-astronauts for the harsh conditions of space, and would quite possibly be the most expensive stage overall.

Drilling Stage With the introduction of the greenhouse producing factories on Mars, there would not be a noticeable change in either Mars' surface temperature or its atmospheric pressure. Unlike the first stage, which requires lots of preparation time but has immediate results, both the Industrialization and the Drilling stages need to be in effect for decades before Mars will undergo a noticeable change. Since a large amount of time will be needed for the Industrialization Stage, the Drilling Stage should be put in to effect immediately after the completion of the factories. There are two major benefits of this stage following the establishing of the factories. The first is that this will give the workers who assembled the factories something to do rather than simply being sent back to Earth. The second is that liquid water is believed to exist about 800 meters under Mars' frozen surface (Hurtak); if liquid water is found, it will not only release water vapor into the atmosphere, but also provide a source of fresh water for those living on Mars to use. The drilling equipment would have to either be flown assembled from Earth, or in parts to be assembled in factories upon reaching Mars. Many of the workers who were involved in setting up the factories could be taught to use the drilling equipment under the supervision of astronomers and geologists who determine where to drill in order to release the most greenhouse gases. The Drilling Stage is the least effective stage of the entire terraforming process, but it is also the cheapest and has the added benefit of possibly providing water and mapping out wells for future habitation on Mars.

Appendices

Appendix A: Process Description of The Greenhouse Effect

The Greenhouse Effect is the process by which light and energy from the Sun reaches the Earth (or another celestial body with an atmosphere), is converted to heat, and is then unable to freely leave the planet's atmosphere. This process is absolutely necessary for a planet to retain heat and therefore support life. The audience this process description is intended for is comprised of people who are skeptical or unaware of the plausibility of using greenhouse gasses to heat Mars to an inhabitable temperature.
This process description is not intended for use by the main audience of my formal analytical report (NASA), because it is a very basic process. Instead, this explanation of the Greenhouse Effect is meant to be used by my secondary audience.
To fully understand this process, one must have a general understanding of how the Earth's surface absorbs radiation from the Sun, which is then radiated back into space from the Earth's surface. Thanks to greenhouse gasses in the upper atmosphere, some of this heat that would be lost to space is trapped in the lower atmosphere, keeping our planet at a liveable temperature. One must also understand what, specifically greenhouse gasses are and the role they play in the Greenhouse Effect. A greenhouse gas is any atmospheric gas that reflects infrared radiation given off by the Earth as a result of being heated by the Sun. These include carbon dioxide, methane, nitrous oxide, water vapor, ozone, and CFCs.
This process occurs all day everyday on Earth, but on planets like Mars, which has a thin atmosphere, lacking the thick covering of greenhouse gasses that Earth has, there is no Greenhouse Effect. This is why the presence of greenhouse gasses in the atmosphere is crucial for a planet to retain its heat. Some planets, such as Venus, have thick atmospheres full of greenhouse gasses. Some, like Mars, have very thin atmospheres whose greenhouse gasses trap very little heat. Earth is a comfortable middle ground between Venus, which is far too hot to be habitable, and Mars, which is far too cold. Whatever the levels of greenhouse gasses in a planet's atmosphere, the planet must also be close enough to a star so that it receives appropriate radiation.

Stages In The Process:
Once a planet is close enough to a star and has an adequate level of greenhouse gasses, some of the star's emitted radiation will pass through the planet's atmosphere while some is reflected back in to space by the atmosphere. In order for this step to take place, the planet's atmosphere must not be too reflective, or not enough radiation will pass though it.
The radiation that is not reflected into space by the atmosphere will mostly be absorbed by the planet's surface, (some is reflected by the planet's surface) warming it temporarily. The planet then gives off its own infrared radiation, or heat.
The infrared radiation generated by the planet is then lost to space, unless there are greenhouse gasses present. In this case, the greenhouse gasses act as insulation for the planet, reflecting heat back towards the planet and keeping it warm. The amount of greenhouse gasses present in the atmosphere determines the amount of heat that is lost to space and the amount that is re-radiated in the planet's direction.

Glossary

Acidophilic: Classification of methanogens that live in environments with high acid concentrations (pH less than 4).

Alkaliphilic: Classification of methanogens that live in environments with high base concentrations (pH higher than 8).

Anaerobic: Able to live without oxygen in the air. Applies to cells and bacteria. Strict anaerobes cannot live in the presence of oxygen.

Asteroid: Any celestial body ranging from a mile to 480 miles in diameter.

Astrobiologist: Someone who studies life beyond the Earth's atmosphere.

Atmosphere: The gaseous envelope which surrounds any given celestial body.

Carrying Capacity: The maximum number of organisms of a particular species that can be supported in a given environment.

Celestial: Of or pertaining to the sky and space.

CFC: Any of various halocarbon compounds consisting of carbon, hydrogen, chlorine, and fluorine.

Dry Ice: Carbon dioxide in its solid form.

Greenhouse Effect: See Appendix A

Greenhouse Gas: Any gas which adds to the Greenhouse Effect.

Halophilic: Classification of methanogens that lives in environments with high salt (NaCl) concentrations.

HFC: Any of various halocarbon compounds consisting of carbon, hydrogen, and fluorine, but which do not contain chlorine.

Hyperthermophilic: Classification of methanogens that lives in extremely high temperatures, typically about 176-235ºF.

Lunar: Of or pertaining to a moon as opposed to other celestial bodies.

Methanogens: Methane producing bacteria.

Ozone: An unstable, poisonous molecule composed of three oxygen atoms which absorbs ultraviolet radiation.

PFC: Any of various compounds which are made entirely out of carbon and fluorine.

Psychrophilic: Classification of methanogens that lives in cold temperatures typically about 28-60ºF.

Runaway Greenhouse Effect: The result of an unbalanced Greenhouse Effect in which there are too many greenhouse gases.

Satellite: Any body that orbits a planet. May be natural, ie. the moon, or man-made, ie. a space station.

Terraform: The act of making any celestial body that is not the Earth inhabitable by humans or more Earth-like.

Terrestrial: Of or pertaining to the Earth as opposed to any other celestial body.

Thermophilic: Classification of methanogens that live in high temperatures typically about 131-176ºF.

Works Cited

Bortman, Henry. “Thawing Mars.” NASA Astrobiology Institue. 22 January 2001. 7 November 2009. http://nai.nasa.gov/news_stories/news_detail.cfm?ID=212

CIESIN Thematic Guides. “Chlorofluorocarbons and Ozone Depletion.” CIESIN. 19 November 2009. http://www.ciesin.org/TG/OZ/cfcozn.html

Darling, David. The Internet Encyclopedia of Science. http://www.daviddarling.info/encyclopedia

David, Leonard. “Here's the Drill: Mars's Greatest Treasures May Lie Beneath Its Barren, Icy Surface.” Space.com. 17 January 2002. 22 November 2009. http://www.space.com/businesstechnology/technology/drill_mars_020117.html

EPA. The United States Environmental Protection Agency. 19 November 2009. http://www.epa.gov

Gerstell, M.F., Fransisco, J.S., Yung, Y.L., Boxe, C. and Aaltonee, E.T. “Keeping Mars Warm With New Super Greenhouse Gases.” PNAS.org. 11 January 2001. 30 October 2009. http://www.pnas.org/content/98/5/2154.full

“Greenhouse Gases: Some Definitions.” GDRC. 19 November 2009. http://www.gdrc.org/uem/waste/waste-gases.html

Hopwood, Nick and Cohen, Jordan. “Greenhouse Gases and Society.” 19 November 2009. http://www.umich.edu/~gs265/society/greenhouse.htm

Hurtak, D.M. M.S.Sc. “The Quest to Terraform Mars.” The Academy For Future Science. 10 Novmeber 2009. http://www.affs.org/html/the_quest_to_terraform_mars.html

Inconvenient Truth, An. November 19 2009. http://www.climatecrisis.net/

Khemani, Haresh. “Chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs): Refrigerants That Cause Ozone Layer Depletion.” Bright Hub. 29 June 2009. 19 November 2009. http://www.brighthub.com/engineering/mechanical/articles/965.aspx

“Mars, Water On.” Water Encyclopedia. 19 November 2009. http://www.waterencyclopedia.com/La-Mi/Mars-Water-on.html

Meeres, Andrew. “Archaeans – Methanogens in Extreme Environments.” Suite101.com http://microbiology.suite101.com/article.cfm/methanogens

“New Light On Mars Methane Mystery.” BBCNews. 15 January 2009. 19 November 2009. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7829315.stm

“Perfluorocarbons (PFCs).” Fluorocarbons and Sulfur Hexafluoride. 19 November 2009. http://www.fluorocarbons.org/en/info/brochures/fact_10.html

Philips, Tony Dr. “Terraforming Mars.” FirstScience.com. 6 January 2001. 9 November 2009. http://www.firstscience.com/site/articles/terraform.asp

“Terraforming Mars.” MarsNews.com. 30 October 2009. http://www.marsnews.com/focus/terraforming

Uherek, Elmar. “Water Vapor – A Greenhouse Gas.” 19 November 2009. http://www.espere.net/Unitedkingdom/water/uk_watervapour.html

Young, Kelly. “Greenhouse Gases Could Breather Life Into Mars.” NewScientist.com. 4 February 2005. http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn6973

Zubrin, Robert M. and McKay, Christopher P. "Technological Requirements for Terraforming Mars." 22 November 2009. http://www.users.globalnet.co.uk/~mfogg/zubrin.htm

Communication and Gender in America

Communication and society constantly change each other, shaping both the words and grammar of the language used to communicate, and the cultural values of the society. Since the majority of societies have different roles for men and women, it is no wonder that they would use their shared language to communicate differently within their societies. It is not fair to judge if any particular style of communication works better than any other, but these differences can shape our perceptions of each other and often even muddle communication between genders. The individuals which make up American society pride themselves on their liberty, independence, and rational equality for all citizens, but at the same time, almost everyone knows that men and women communicate differently. Few people ever bother to think about how each gender communicates, (beyond the obvious stereotypes) or how our society has developed two very distinct styles of conversation. According to linguist Deborah Tannen, the differences are not in what each gender says, but how they say it. Noticeable differences exist at all ages in body language, ways of reassuring one another, willingness to remain on a single topic, and content discussed between males and females in American society. These differences in conversational style can be summed up with the statement: “Men use 'agnostic' or warlike, oppositional formats to do almost anything; thus discussion becomes debate, and conversation a competitive sport. In contrast, women see conversation as a ritual means of establishing rapport.” (Tannen 35) Each gender communicates in a way that directly reflects the expectations placed upon them by society.
The reason men seem to communicate with each other in a competitive manner is because males in America are socialized to see everything in hierarchical terms. From an early age, males in American society are taught that they must compete with each other in order to define their own status in society. On the other hand, women have intrinsic social status because they can give birth to and nurture children, a vital role in all societies. Because of this, women can add to or detract from their intrinsic social status through doing and achieving, or can remain at a “neutral” social status through simply being a part of society. Unfortunately, many women in modern American society choose not to risk their inherent status, and so they are perceived by men as timid, or as simply not having anything interesting to say in a public forum. Thus, men tend to dominate the majority of talking time in public and formal settings.
The counter-balance to this phenomenon is that women dominate the talking time in private settings while men tend to remain quiet. Since men view public conversation as a form of competition, when in a private setting they can relax, no longer feeling obligated to prove themselves. Women see private conversation as a setting in which they can speak their minds without worry about being judged for what they say. This type of talk is not about social status, but instead revolves around building interpersonal relationships, showing that those involved in the conversation are of equal standing rather than hierarchical. Women in private conversations often exchange personal information or experiences as a way of reassuring doubts or comforting others.
Men, even in private conversations, tend to show a competitive edge, reassuring others through introducing bigger problems or simply discrediting the original doubt. When men and women converse with each other, women often find this belittling or demeaning when it is meant as a gesture of compassion. For whatever reason, men also tend to avoid eye contact with each other while engaged in these personal conversations. Women, who frequently make eye contact and “more listener-noise, such as 'mhm,' uhun,' and 'yeah,'” (Tannen 35) can find see this as a sign that the men are not paying attention when in fact, they are. Another area in which the genders clash is “topical alignment.” In examining communication differences between genders at an early age, Tannen found that “The girls in my study tended to talk at length about one topic, but the boys tended to jump from topic totopic,” (Tannen 34). Many women view this too as a sign that the man they are conversing with is not really interested in what she is saying. Similarly, many men can find the agreement and support offered by women in conversation irritating, as they often times prefer the conflict and opposing viewpoints that a male conversational partner would typically offer.
English professor and pioneer in the newly developed field of men's studies, Eugene August, claims that the reason men tend to be so competitive and hierarchical is because they are actually more narrowly socialized towards particular ends than women. Throughout the American male's life, August says, “If he deviates from society's gender role norm, he will be penalized and he will hear about it,” (August 26). Chief among the penalties for this deviation is the questioning of the man's masculinity. Throughout his informational essay on American gender differences, August gives many examples of words whose only function is to describe males who act femininely. Since men in American societies consider this to be a severe psychological attack, it is no wonder that they differ greatly in conversation habits from women. This is not, of course, to say that the qualities Americans value in women are intrinsically bad, but that they are seen as undesirable in males.
In American society, females are also socialized throughout their lives, but in different manners than are males. As mentioned by August, and many sociologists before him, “it is usually acceptable for girls to be tomboys,” (August 23) or, act like boys their age, but it is not so for boys who act girlishly. Yet while females are freer to deviate from their gender norms, they can only differ so much before society starts to disapprove. The ultimate example of this is the depiction of the Amazon women in Greek mythology, who would remove one of their breasts in order to perform better in combat, and displayed many of the qualities the Greeks admired in their own male warriors. The Greeks tended to view the Amazon women as either gender neutral or as men, in essence saying that in order for it to be acceptable for women to act as men do, “they had to trade in part of their femininity,” (Nilsen 10). Thus females were, and still are, taught that they cannot have all the qualities admired in each gender, but instead must pick one.
In the past few decades, American society has rapidly become more tolerant of gender role deviations in both sexes. Women can now be seen as successful, while men can possess strong social skills. Despite this rise in tolerance, “traditional” gender roles are still strongly reinforced through literature and other forms of media. In his 1996 article, “Sex Differences,” Ronald Macaulay offers two lists of 12 verbs used by each gender to introduce speech in novels. “The surprising part is that the two lists are totally distinct. No doubt the novelists intended to be realistic in describing two very different styles of speech but, in doing so, they also reinforce the stereotypes of men and women,” (273). All the verbs used by the males implied dominance or conflict, while those used by females implied obedience or ineptitude. Unfortunately, short of rewriting classic works so as not to reinforce gender stereotypes there is nothing that can be done about this particular form of socialization.
It is interesting to see where gender role tolerance will take American society and how it will change the ways in which we communicate with each other. Already, battles are being fought by linguists over gender neutrality and gender biases within the English language. Some take the position that in a society which can tolerate gender role deviation, all literature and language should be gender neutral to prevent stereotyping. Still others feel that no matter how carefully language and literature are regulated to maintain gender neutrality, some form of bias will still appear. My own opinion on gender regulation within language is that it serves as a bureaucratic false image of tolerance while it in fact breeds conformity to the regulations rather than the actual ideas they are meant to represent. Either way, the battle of the sexes within American society and the English language is far from over, and will likely be an issue that both linguists and sociologists will examine for decades to come.

Works Cited
August, Eugene R. “Real Men Don't: Anti-Male Bias in English.” Encountering Cultures: Second Edition. Ed. Richard Holeton, Balir Press, 1995. 20-31. Print.
Macaulay, Ronald. “Sex Differences.” Exploring Language 12th Edition. Ed. Gary Goshgarion, Longman Press, 2010. 270-275. Print.
Nilsen, Alleen Pace. “Sexism in English: A 1990's Update.” Encountering Cultures: Second Edition. Ed. Richard Holeton, Blair Press, 1995. 10-19. Print.
Tannen, Deborah. “'I'll Explain It to You': Lecturing and Listening.” Exploring Language 12th Edition. Ed. Gary Goshgarion, Longman Press, 2010. 281-293. Print.
Tannen, Deborah. “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Encountering Cultures: Second Edition. Ed. Richard Holeton, Blair Press, 1995. 32-37. Print.

Merrily

Sleeping by a river's bank

I slip into a dream.

In my mind the rapid river

Becomes a gentle stream.

The tide of dreams will ebb and flow

Forever bringing more.

The sand from which my castle's built,

The wind on which I soar.

Each wave brings with it, crashing down,

a dream upon the shore.

And so, my rest replenishing,

I drown myself to reach the gleam,

Resplendent through the murky depths

At the bottom of the stream.

Death would be not painful,

If life were but a dream.